Topic: Weird Shit
Vietnamese farmer Thai Ngoc once awoke with a bad fever in 1973... and never fell asleep again. Now, not even sleeping pills, homeopathic remedies or even booze can knock out this hardworking man, who guards his property and tends his livestock and crops while everyone else sleeps.And he has no side effects.
“I don’t know whether the insomnia has impacted my health or not. But I’m still healthy and can farm normally like others,” Ngoc said.
And it's not like the dude is out of shape and sluggish. He carries two 50kg sacks of grain home every day after work. We can't do that, and we work out! This guy is a superhero! INSOMNIMAN!
THANHNIENNEWS.COM via SPLOID
Posted by James
at 4:39 PM CST
The three skanks from Massachusetts that we reported about a short time ago (link 
A completely embarrassing week for Dick Cheney has just gotten worse, as complications have arisen in his shooting victim's recovery as 78-year-old Harry Wittington had a "silent heart attack" today due to some errant birdshot either touching his heart or lodged inside his heart.
Embattled memoirist James Frey, who was thisclose to having been drank out of our memory forever, has a new attack dog, and Oprah and her cohorts in attack (looks like we'd better watch out too - ed., you said it... that dude is old and pissy!) better watch their backs, because you can't kill Bruce Willis off. That guy can take a beating like no one else.
Some Virginia county Sheriff's deputies, as well as Sheriff Howard D. Smith, are in some pretty hot water after it was learned that they engaged known prostitutes and received hand jobs before arresting the women, all in the name of evidence.
Former President Bill Clinton's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy regarding homosexuality in the military has cost the government an estimated $363 million discharging (not a pun - ed.) some 10,000 servicemen after they were discovered to be gay.
Peter Benchley, the author who created the beast that became synonymous with bad facial hair and holy terror on the high seas, "Jaws," died Sunday at age 65. The acclaimed writer died of idiopathic pulmonary fibrosis, a progressive and fatal scarring of the lungs, instead of being devoured alive by a Great White shark, which most of the world would have preferred, just for the freakiness.
We know that other countries excel at the Olympic Winter Games, especially in places like Finland and Norway, where our NFL is their... K125 ski jumping. But America has fallen behind in the medal count early int he games, with the Norwegians taking the lead.
Why we here at Heart of Darko are always interested in approval polls is beyond us. They serve as no barometer for anything, considering that the survey is of 1,000 people at random, and having a sample size of 1,000 in a country of hundreds of millions is like looking at ten M&Ms in a two pound bag to see what the color break down is.
A team of Athens, Greece, bank robbers turned genius really quick, probably after their last heist was almost foiled by an unreliable car. Well, no more of that. This time they just figured out they wouldn't even get out of the car.
A woman in Arkadelphia, Arkansas, saved an "exotic" chicken named Boo Boo by giving it mouth to mouth after it was found, um, beak down in a swimming pool. After blowing twice in the chicken's dirty, vile mouth, it began to breath again.
Is The Great One, Wayne Gretzky, currently coach of his beloved Phoenix Coyotes (we made that up - ed.), involved in a national gambling ring? Federal wire taps may say yes, even though Gretzky came out yesterday and said he knew nothing of it. The FBI has his voice on tape discussing it.
The GM death throes seem to be continuing, as a rare "sell" rating was put on the embattled company today, a first from Deutsche Bank for the automaker, which continues to stumble.
While we merely wanted to say "boner" in a headline, perhaps the Republicans should've chosen someone else as the new House Majority Leader, as it's been announced today that their new selection, John Boehner (pronounced BAY-ner - ed.) rents his D.C. apartment from a lobbyist and his wife. After the Abramoff crap, this might have not been such a slick move.
Wal-Mart, that decidedly un-redneck department store where one can purchase twenty pairs of tube socks for three dollars before walking over to see if your oil change is completed and if the donuts are fresh in the bakery, has decided that 3,200 stores is not enough, and are in fact planning a nationwide takeover of the retail market by open another 1,500 stores in the coming years, including about 350 this year. Say it with us: Wal-Mart owns by soul.