Topic: Housekeeping
What is there to do this weekend in this wonderfully dimwitted country of ours? Let's take a look to see how we can get you off the couch and spending some money for the good of our economy.NBA PLAYOFFS - Tonight and on Saturday only, and don't go out and get drunk that night either, mister. You've got the Suns/Clippers at 10:80 tonight after the Nets/Cavs. Tomorrow sees the Mavs/Spurs and Pistons/Heat. Good games all around... except for the Pistons/Heat. That's like watching the Harlem Globetrotters play a team of kiddy pool-bound manatees.
MOTHER'S DAY - Celebrate your explosion from your mother's loins and the years of wine-dependent misery you brought upon her with a box of chocolates. Because she already knows you lost your salary on the Pistons/Heat game because you thought the Heat could beat the spread. Don't worry. She cleaned up your shit for years. She'll loan you twenty bucks for gas money.
TATTOOS FOR EVERYONE! - Get a "Mom" tattoo in celebration. Regret it the next day.
Posted by James
at 4:56 PM CDT
