Topic: Politics
Sure, we've been out of the loop for a while after going on our hiatus. But we took two days off from our menial labor job to break things down for you today, but most importantly, tomorrow. From our humble beginnings as a truly awful political blog to our current standing is a mildly distracting stupid news site, we've been reading thousands of pages of politial hooey for over two years.
And this evening, we give you the last round of USA Today/Gallup polls, which were found to be so horribly off during last election cycle that we don't know if we can trust them. But it's fun to do so anyway. However, we'll be quick about it, since Seinfeld is coming on TBS in a minute and we bought two four packs of Guiness to finish the day. So here's your breakdown:
Congerssional Races - Democrats lead in five polls, including Ohio and Pennsylvania. But that's not good news for them yet. Even if they take every single one of those, they're still one seat off of a majority. But a nationwide poll shows the Lefties running up on the Righters by a 51-44% majority, meaning little, since only residents of the districts with seats up for election can vote.
Stem Cell Voting - In the Missouri Second Amendment vote which we profiled earlier, we noted Marty McFly (Michael J. Fox, for your non-fans of 80s movies - ed.) and his ads supporting embryonic stem cell research. 74% of people are in support of this, proving again that the GOP doesn't know its people at all.
Overall Thoughts - Too close to call. State-wide elections weren't mentioned in the poll, and each state's gubernatorial elections weren't addressed, but it should be an interesting day tomorrow. We'll be braving the crackheads and muggers to get to our polling place tomorrow when we wake up (say, about noon or so), and we recommend you do the same.
Remember to get drunk afterwards and check in here often, as we will continually update you on the exit poll madness and political speculation that will be going on as soon as the polls open up at 8:00AM. And we'll try to be as impartial in our television viewing as we can by watching CSPAN's coverage. But towards the evening, we'll be drunk enough to be switching to CNN and Fox News, since our minds will require some sensationalism after all the boring shit we've justs watched on the SPAN.
