Topic: Embarrassment
We've been creating enough drinking games lately with meteoric popularity (you be quiet... people liked it! - ed.), so now we've decided for tonight's drunken election results debauchery to steal a drinking game from the good alcoholics over at Wonkette.
While this game is a bit short and quite interactive, considering that you must be using both the Internet and the boob tube, it's a good one nonetheless. So drink up, friends, and remember that election results aren't in until 7:00PM, so don't feel bad when coverage at 6:00 doesn't really show much of anything.
Take a hit when:
- DailyKos makes a crazy fraud accusation.
- Rick Santorum shows up on TV for no apparent reason.
- Katie Couric mispronounces a U.S. state name.
- Chris Matthews’ spittle becomes visible to the home audience.
- A black voter is interviewed about not getting to vote.
And then we get serious, after the jump.
Take two sips when:
- The Corner makes an even crazier fraud accusation.
- Matt Drudge calls it for Republicans.
- First liberal blogger of the night says he’s moving to Canada.
- GOP incumbent claims Republicans “control spending.”
Take a shot when:
- Tim Russert’s goddamned sketch-board first appears.
- Wonkette editor Alex Pareene makes a vulgar gesture while CNN “checks in with the bloggers.”
- George Allen concedes.
- Weary Fox News commentator accuses Democrats of wanting to “Cut and Paste.”
- Kinky Friedman wins.
- Things are so blurry that you can’t tell Brian Williams and Tom Brokaw apart.
- Bush tries to concede.
Lightning Round:
- Brit Hume weeps on-air: Entire bottle of champagne, one Xanax.
- Jack Cafferty punches Wolf Blitzer in the mouth: Three shots of bourbon, vomit on remote.
- Katherine Harris wins: Have a “Crying Jesus” — two rails of meth and then give your Republican neighbor a blowjob.
- Exit polls completely “wrong,” GOP actually keeps the House and Senate and most governorships: Bottle of absinthe, pack of Camels, shoot dog.
You've got mere hours left, and don't forget about campaign parties in your neighborhood. Our friend Goldfinger will be here tonight with us to attempt to dual-blog this hooker to death and probably end up playing a lot of videogames after we lose interest.
